More on joy

Last week in Relief Society, the lesson was from the Ezra Taft Benson Manual - Lesson 4, entitled "Living Joyfully in Troubled Times." Jake and I needed many reminders offered in this lesson, as lately it's seemed like a lot of things have been hard (thank heavens there are also many things that are going very well!).

Here is one of my favorite quotes from the lesson:
We will all have disappointments and discouragements—that is part of life. But if we will have faith, our setbacks will be but a moment and success will come out of our seeming failures. Our Heavenly Father can accomplish miracles through each of us if we will but place our confidence and trust in Him.⁵

We have no cause to really worry. Live the gospel, keep the commandments. Attend to your prayers night and morning in your home. Maintain the standards of the Church. Try and live calmly and cheerfully. … Happiness must be earned from day to day. But it is worth the effort.¹⁰

There are times when you simply have to righteously hang on and outlast the devil until his depressive spirit leaves you. 

During the lesson last week, Grandma Karoleen Wilsey (who was teaching) provided an analogy that I really liked - she drew a house, labeled the foundation as "Faith," the walls as "Hope," the door as "Optimism" and the roof as "Inner Peace." She then invited the sisters to name things that helped them to "outlast the devil."

I thought these were really good ideas because there are many days when you really do have to choose happiness. Here are some things that bring happiness to sisters in my ward that might help me someday:
- Expressing gratitude
- Reviewing your Patriarchal Blessing
- Writing thank-you notes
- Creating (taking pictures, rearranging a room, making cards, writing letters)
- Writing in a journal/blogging
- Getting enough sleep
- Praying, especially prayers of gratitude before going to bed
- Being around people who are happy/choose happiness
- Reading the scriptures
- Spending time with family
- Playing with pets
- Crying
- Going on an outing
- Laughing
- Helping others
- Giving compliments
- Playing games with children or friends or family
- Reading inspiring messages in the Ensign
- Planning a future event/giving yourself something to look forward to
- Going visiting teaching
- Taking silly pictures
- Taking a hot bath
- Working on family history
- Listening to the Mormon Channel
- Listening to or playing good music

- Working

- Being outside

This reminded me of a few things that have made me happy lately!

Family game nights! Had a great time playing "Sleeping Queens" at the Hancocks with some of our favorite people! Also occurred at the Carter household, but unfortunately, we missed that photo opp! I was CRUSHING Jake's dad at Dominos and he was not a happy camper :) Definitely wish we had some of his "tantrums" on video!

Time with our favorite little ones. Jake and I really love spending time with our nieces and nephews, whether it is teaching Nathan how to "floss" at church or reading stories under blankets with Mikayla and Maylee, it's sure to put some smiles on our faces. Jake had the privilege of putting the Hancock girls to bed a couple of weeks ago and he has felt pretty fantastic about himself ever since!

Lastly, celebrating mommyhood and friendship with some of my favorite people. Kelsey Kartchner (my friend from undergrad who ended up marrying my first cousin once removed/good friend Jeffrey Paul Kartchner and ended up being in my ward and pretty much my closest friend since undergrad) is due wit her first baby (a girl) on March 8th. Natalie Kartchner (a la Jeffrey Zane Kartchner) and Serena Allred helped put together a shower for her early in February. It was beautiful and such fun to celebrate something good with so many good people.

Then, last night, as a "last hurrah," Kelsey and I enjoyed a night out on the town, complete with Greek food, goofy pictures at the mall, Sees chocolate, and perusing books at Target like the true speech therapist geeks that we are. It has gone down in my record book as one of my favorite nights ever.

Last week after our lesson, my second counselor, Janiel Cragun, said something that rang rather true with me - "True joy comes from those things that require sacrifice." I am so grateful for the relationships in my life that bring me such great joy. I'm grateful for those that sacrifice to be my friend (hehe ;>).

Kickin' Pricks

I'm really good at resisting direction from Heavenly Father, especially when I've already made up my mind that things are going to work out a certain way. . . It's amazing how miserable I can make myself by insisting that things have to work out a certain way.

When I was a young woman, my dad introduced me to the scriptural reference of "kicking against the pricks" (See Acts 9:5 or 26:14). Apparently Saul was also good at resisting instruction/direction. When the Lord greeted him he asked Saul why he would kick against the pricks. This reference was made to the not-so-helpful behavior of cattle or oxen who, when directed with a prod, resisted the direction by kicking back against the prick. The irony of doing so is that, in the end, the only one who ends up hurt is the person doing the kicking.

I seem to kick a lot. I might even call it pride.

A couple of weeks ago, I was sooooo stressed that I started to pray to ask Heavenly Father for help to deal with my stress. I'm sure He sent some subtle hints first, but I'm also sure I didn't listen. So this is what I planned for my week:

The picture is sideways and I cannot figure out how to rotate it but you get the idea. I had a lot to do and was pretty sure it was going to be a miserable week. I hadn't made much room for changes in plans or miracles. Also, I was starting to show some signs of unhealthiness related to the stress.

So here was Heavenly Father's response...

Six days of sleeping 20-23 hours/day, an urgent care visit, an ENT visit, and the worst sinus infection I've ever had later.... I was well-rested, and my stress levels had dropped to just about zero.

And, as an added bonus, there were tender mercies sent (only those photograph-able are captured below). Many texts, calls, and prayers were made in Jake's and my behalf in addition to soup and dessert from the Hancocks, dinner from the Dickeys, and homemade wheat bread from Judy Wolgamot. Needless to say, we felt very very loved.

After sleeping for six straight days, I went back to work for the first time on my birthday. It was a simple day but will be one of my most treasured days because I had a renewed appreciation (not perfect, but better than before) of the beauty of the simple blessings in life - health, family, friendship, and the Atonement.

Looking forward to a lifetime of Heavenly Father continuing to teach me these lessons.

Cuties

Can you tell that Jake and I are home sick this weekend?

I am so grateful for family. They are my treasure. Here are two of the four cuties that make my world go round (in addition to other family members who aren't so apt to take selfies during snuggle time). Meagan and Dustin, I hope you don't mind my posting pics of your kids.

Happiness. Pure happiness.

Finding Joy in the Journey

This is one of those things that I feel like I need to talk about, but I never really want to bring up because, well, it would likely be awkward and might also give people the wrong idea. Not looking for a pity party here. More looking to explain something that other people might question about my life. Not that I care (or should care) too much about what others think, but, let's be real... I do.

I'm also posting this as a bit of a self-help/therapy because this is something that Jake and I work every day to not only accept but also to embrace as "the wisdom of Him who knoweth all things."

Here is what I thought my family would look like as I approached my 27th birthday...

Ya, so they're Asian and the photo was taken in the 90s but you get the idea :)

Here is what my family actually looks like:

Here is what I thought my full-time job would look like:

(That is supposed to represent me playing with my child). Here is what it actually looks like:

Not too different, huh?!? Just a matter of who the kids belong to, and in the end, they're all Heavenly Father's, and I love them dearly.

I have written in my journal before that looking back in life, I am often awed by the beautifully orchestrated plan of Heavenly Father. At the time, line by line, instrument by instrument, the piece may not "make sense." However, when it all comes together, it sounds and feels more beautiful than anyone, especially myself, could have imagined.

In the meantime, our work is to "find joy in the journey."